{"componentChunkName":"component---src-templates-blog-post-js","path":"/blog/humans-will-literally-spend-1000s-on-online-courses-instead-of-going-to-therapy/","result":{"data":{"site":{"siteMetadata":{"title":"Cognitive Artifacts","author":"Paul Mills"}},"mdx":{"id":"d24908e7-35e3-55fa-b879-d2e6b9d6cd4d","excerpt":"I’ve signed up for many online courses. I’ve paid one-time fees from $9.99 to $800 and paid monthly subscriptions for sites that only taught my bank account…","body":"function _extends() { _extends = Object.assign || function (target) { for (var i = 1; i < arguments.length; i++) { var source = arguments[i]; for (var key in source) { if (Object.prototype.hasOwnProperty.call(source, key)) { target[key] = source[key]; } } } return target; }; return _extends.apply(this, arguments); }\n\nfunction _objectWithoutProperties(source, excluded) { if (source == null) return {}; var target = _objectWithoutPropertiesLoose(source, excluded); var key, i; if (Object.getOwnPropertySymbols) { var sourceSymbolKeys = Object.getOwnPropertySymbols(source); for (i = 0; i < sourceSymbolKeys.length; i++) { key = sourceSymbolKeys[i]; if (excluded.indexOf(key) >= 0) continue; if (!Object.prototype.propertyIsEnumerable.call(source, key)) continue; target[key] = source[key]; } } return target; }\n\nfunction _objectWithoutPropertiesLoose(source, excluded) { if (source == null) return {}; var target = {}; var sourceKeys = Object.keys(source); var key, i; for (i = 0; i < sourceKeys.length; i++) { key = sourceKeys[i]; if (excluded.indexOf(key) >= 0) continue; target[key] = source[key]; } return target; }\n\n/* @jsx mdx */\nvar _frontmatter = {\n  \"path\": \"online-courses-instead-of-therapy\",\n  \"date\": \"2021-03-23T01:46:42.837Z\",\n  \"title\": \" Humans Will Literally Spend $1000s on Online Courses Instead of Going to Therapy\",\n  \"description\": \"Lessons learned chasing self-improvement \"\n};\n\nvar makeShortcode = function makeShortcode(name) {\n  return function MDXDefaultShortcode(props) {\n    console.warn(\"Component \" + name + \" was not imported, exported, or provided by MDXProvider as global scope\");\n    return mdx(\"div\", props);\n  };\n};\n\nvar layoutProps = {\n  _frontmatter: _frontmatter\n};\nvar MDXLayout = \"wrapper\";\nreturn function MDXContent(_ref) {\n  var components = _ref.components,\n      props = _objectWithoutProperties(_ref, [\"components\"]);\n\n  return mdx(MDXLayout, _extends({}, layoutProps, props, {\n    components: components,\n    mdxType: \"MDXLayout\"\n  }), mdx(\"p\", null, \"I\\u2019ve signed up for many online courses. I\\u2019ve paid one-time fees from $9.99 to $800 and paid monthly subscriptions for sites that only taught my bank account subtraction. I\\u2019ve participated in seminars on the philosophers Deleuze and Heidegger, tried multiple introductions to drawing, taken deep dives and brief overviews of programming topics. Reflecting on the courses I\\u2019ve enrolled in, started, partially completed, fully completed, abandoned, and am actively in now, I\\u2019ve come to better understand what motivated me to sign up in the first place.\"), mdx(\"h2\", null, \"Fighting Imposter Syndrome\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"Because I got into software engineering through a bootcamp (12-week learning-intensive compared to a traditional 4-year computer science degree), I registered for multiple coding courses. I\\u2019d often feel precarious when I compared myself to folks with technical degrees. Credentialism sucks. In place of getting a master\\u2019s, I thought I could plod hours into online courses and substitute a degree with grit. In reflection, I\\u2019d be far better off just building things with the skills I already had, and only turning to online courses when I found an actual need, like signing up for a comprehensive course on test writing, when I need to start writing tests.\"), mdx(\"h2\", null, \"F\", \"*\", \"ck you skillset\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"For those not familiar with the phrase \\u201CF\", \"*\", \"ck you money,\\u201D it means the amount of wealth one would need to say \\u201CF\", \"*\", \"ck you\\u201D to any individual or organization and not face repercussions. If you work a job you hate, because you have obligations (children/loans/lifestyle), it\\u2019s the amount you\\u2019d need to quit that job on a whim, burning bridges on your way out, and be fiscally okay. The number varies whether the only person you care to say \\u201CF\", \"*\", \"ck you\\u201D to is your employer, versus someone like Elon Musk who basically said it to the SEC.\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"As I passed on opportunities that were high earning, but personally soul-crushing (much love to my friends in finance), I instead found myself trying to get a \\u201CF\", \"*\", \"ck you skillset,\\u201D the assortment of skills that would ensure I could always provide for myself without a large drop in standard of living. What I\\u2019ve realized, is that I didn\\u2019t want \\u201CF\", \"*\", \"ck you\\u201D money or skills, I just wanted to be intellectually and emotionally vulnerable and thought I needed impenetrable economic security to do that.\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"Turns out you don\\u2019t, you just need two things. 1) The courage to be disliked. Not everyone will like you. Not everyone will be your audience. Accept that and unwarranted criticism will be a minor annoyance. 2) For some people to emotionally resonate when they read your work, even if the grammar/structure/sentences blow. You don\\u2019t need to be understood universally, understood by some is more than enough.\"), mdx(\"h2\", null, \"Technical Self-Expression as Vulnerability Protection\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"If you can\\u2019t just be vulnerable, why not hide your vulnerability through technical precision? For as much as art is talent and self-expression, it\\u2019s also a technical skill. The work of the artist was presented to me as an idle endeavor, the pursuit of those with financial means or those with more soul than sense. But there was an exception, mastery is undeniable. Examine a photo-realistic painting, even if it doesn\\u2019t trigger an emotional response, the skill and hard work it takes to create that is astounding.\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"The online Atelier, the drawing basics course I discovered through the book \\u201CUltralearning\\u201D, the various digital art courses (pixel animation, Blender, Maya, Photoshop), all things purchased, intros watched and never revisited. I didn\\u2019t want to learn to draw or create 3D scenes, I wanted to express myself, and thought I could justify it as the pursuit of a difficult skill.\"), mdx(\"h2\", null, \"Takeaways\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"The title of this piece is both homage to the memes I\\u2019ve seen online and truthful. The insights I\\u2019ve gained are the kind of thing I expect you could get from working with a therapist. But I also know that I\\u2019ve kept a close guard when it comes to being vulnerable, and I\\u2019m not sure I would have been able to open up enough for it to have worked for me.\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"What I\\u2019d like for you to take from this piece, isn\\u2019t that you shouldn\\u2019t take online courses. I\\u2019ve only managed to write this piece because I\\u2019m enrolled in \", mdx(\"a\", _extends({\n    parentName: \"p\"\n  }, {\n    \"href\": \"https://writeofpassage.school/\"\n  }), \"Write of Passage\"), \". I\\u2019d like you to pause whenever you want something. Want it enough to take action, to pay money, or to spend your time. Please, meditate on whether it is a substitution for something else.\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"I\\u2019ve spent much of my life wanting things because friends, family, marketing, media, all told me I should want or need them. I thought I needed to do more to compete with credentials. I thought I needed economic security to speak my mind. I thought I needed skill to justify self-expression. I don\\u2019t need any of those things.\"), mdx(\"p\", null, \"If you have an image of who or where you want to be, check if that image is really what you want, and if it is, check if you need a long roadmap to get there, or if you can start being there today.\"));\n}\n;\nMDXContent.isMDXComponent = true;","frontmatter":{"title":" Humans Will Literally Spend $1000s on Online Courses Instead of Going to Therapy","date":"March 23, 2021","description":"Lessons learned chasing self-improvement "}}},"pageContext":{"slug":"/humans-will-literally-spend-1000s-on-online-courses-instead-of-going-to-therapy/","previous":{"fields":{"slug":"/should-i-join-a-coding-bootcamp/"},"frontmatter":{"title":"Should I Join a Coding Bootcamp?"}},"next":null}}}